Day 1 Chemo 3. Thu 8/31/2017 "severe gastritis, good vibes, we love Karen"

Day 1 Chemo 3. Thu 8/31/2017 1:50PM

Based on my previous experiences with Chemotherapy 1 and 2 the usual effect of the medications on my system is severe gastritis. This had been mentioned as well in the article of Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center stating that chemotherapy often affects digestive system causing nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and even decreased appetite. And right at the very day I received Chemotherapy 3 gastritis had struck on me again, bringing quite a misery last night. With the help of the soya milk and the antacid of course, the hunger pangs had subsided, enabling me not to be deprived of slumber. Most of the forum on cancer and the effect of chemotherapy mention about antacids like loperamide, metoclopramide, esomeprazole and olanzapine but no mention about soya milk. For those following my ordeal and are undergoing the same effect of chemotherapy, try soya milk together with the antacid. It really helps. There was a short comment from the Cancer Survivors’ Network of the American Cancer Society about smoothies made of organic yogurt and soya milk working to alleviate an upset stomach due chemotherapy. This of course in my experience is right.

Waking up from a good sleep, got my day started with good vibes. And I guess one good vibe begets another good vibe. And that vibe was no other than my brother Alson, who I observed noticeably in his high favorable propensity for practically almost the whole day. In the afternoon for example around 2PM, he was supposed to take a nap but curtailed himself from doing so because he decided to do some laundry instead. He reckoned that the sun was gleaming  brilliantly and he didn’t like to miss the God given heat in drying up the clothes properly. Beholding him in such a good light, I could really see how nice he becomes when he is in his good mood, able to accomplish things efficiently and contributing a peaceful atmosphere in the entire household, making it conducive to a lot of positive things to come around. And among the positive things are the good breakfast and lunch that he could prepare so deliciously, just like today. Everyone did enjoy eating his dishes. That’s everything that I ever wanted and I just had it today.

Also, I was able to receive blessings today through the help of my good friend Roselyn Cabahug Yu in the “We Love Karen” group. With deep gratitude  my heartfelt thanks goes to you “Bulak” and the following wonderful people:”

1. Drs. Glinda and Jonathan Del Prado
2. Dr. Leilani “Nanan” Cabahug
3. Drs. Lalaine and Allan Sacris
4. Dr. Jezreel Dabon
5. Dr. Aileen Ong
6. Sheila “Shanghai” Revil Valencia
7. Dr. McArthur “Junie” Salonga

Again, I could not thank the Lord enough for all the generous people who have made these blessings possible.

Day 0 Chemo 3. Wed 8/30/2017 "3rd Round Chemotherapy - altruism, benevolence and gratitude"

CHEMOTHERAPY 03

Day 0 Chemo 3. Wed 8/30/2017 9:10PM

3rd Round of Chemotherapy

I just did my 3rd chemotherapy cycle and if all is well the last cycle would be this coming September 20, 2017. As with medical readouts my CBC (Complete Blood Count) was normal, so as my bilirubin and SGPT (Serum Glutamic Pyruvic Transaminase). However, my creatinine was elevated. The highest cut-off in PSH (Perpetual Succour Hospital) lab for creatinine is 1.02 and mine registered 1.12 mg/dl. This of course, triggered the attention of my onco to decrease my cyclophosphamide dose for chemotherapy. Cyclophosphamide is an anti-cancer chemotherapy drug which can cause some side effects like temporary hair loss, nausea and vomiting, poor appetite and others.

Despite of the results, there’s always a rainbow at the end of the road because during that morning I have received an envelope again from the “We love Karen” group and I got teary eyed once more. Indeed, when God shower me with blessings, I really can’t resist the tears. Right away, tears of joy came rushing in my eyes. So though, there had been some abnormalities on my lab results today, still, I couldn’t help but be grateful.

Prior to my chemo, I was not able to visit this morning, my patient whom I delivered yesterday, because there was a fire incident that caused too much traffic. And had I done my rounds first for the patient, I won’t be able to be on time for my chemo. So I decided, to prioritize my treatment then followed up my patient in the afternoon which gave me ample time to have a good conversation with the entire family. Everybody was thanking me, because I took care of Mrs. Catherine Kaye Cruz from 7AM to 5PM yesterday with hardly no break at all and giving her my undivided attention. Minding how much they appreciated such altruism, they handed me an envelope telling me that it was their gift of gratitude on top of what I still have to write as professional fee with the same amount that I told them yesterday. And of course with such benevolence I could not do otherwise but accept it, with full gratitude as well.

In addition, while I was doing my rounds with Mrs. Cruz, I met Dr. Leilani “Nanan” Yee Cabahug once more at SVGH (Saint Vincent General Hospital). She’s the sister-in-law of Dr. Roselyn “Bulak” Cabahug Yu. I have mentioned “once more” because we also met at the chemo unit at PSH (Perpetual Succour Hospital) that morning where I had my third chemo session while she was seeing her patient as a Hematology-Oncologist. She was so surprised of my energy because she knew I just had my chemo this morning and yet in the afternoon I was still up and about doing my rounds. I guess this all boiled too with the regimen I followed. With prayers especially the rosary, support from a live guardian angel who was inspiring me to log a daily journal of my trials, activities and milestones, strong will to survive enhanced by the daily morning and evening meditation by Sonia Ricotti in her “Unsinkable Bounce Back System” and combined with the non-dairy diet mentioned by Jane Plant in her book “The Plant Programme”, following of some suggested non-dairy diets, juicing and smoothies by Kristene Matheson in her book "From Cancer to Wellness, the forgotten secrets", I was able to create a solid base emotionally, physically and spiritually. And that what constitute the regimen I followed to keep me strong and full of energy despite the B17 deficiency problem.

When I was about to leave SVGH  (Saint Vincent General Hospital), I saw my consultant Dr. Clarita Alcantara who also had Breast Cancer stage 2B. At first, she was not able to recognize me because I was wearing my bandana and face mask but later on, she noticed that it was me and we had a little chit-chat. I’m glad that she had her hair back now. It’s an encouragement for my part to see that after all chemotherapies I can expect to have the crowning glory sprouting again, hi...hi...hi.

Well, that’s all for Wednesday I guess.. I have to rest and sleep right away.

Day 20 Chemo 2. Tue. 08/29/2017 "denial of pregnancy, baby boy surprise for Mrs Catherine Kay Cruz"

Day 20 Chemo 2. Tue. 08/29/2017 08:30PM

Yesterday we had a patient who strongly denied that she never had sexual activity that’s why her doctor requested for a transrectal ultrasound instead of transvaginal ultrasound. But when the patient laid down on the examining bed, I noticed that there was a bump on the hypogastric area, so I decided to do a palpation on that area and I felt a hard rounded structure. Noticing that bulge, I explained to the patient that ultrasound on the abdominal area should not be performed because a baby’s head already occupied the hypogastric area.

I came to realized that up to this day there are still lots of young Filipino women who still refused to tell the truth when it comes to their sexual activity and their pregnancy. Usually these happen with girls and ladies who are still under the care of their parents while attending colleges and who by chance had been caught in sexual promiscuity. Unbeknown to the parents the episode would peak to a level that just couldn't be hidden anymore. The hump of their tummy could probably be hidden, yet changes in their biological rhythm would catch them off-guard as well as their parents. So when I have to talk to them about the bump in the hypogastric area the mom would usually ask: "Did you have sex?" I get to smile to both mother and daughter and with a jest I would say: "Of course mommy, definitely an activity like that begets a child. And my dear just accept the fact to your mom." And my oh my, the whole conundrum would unravel that would make the mother so pissed off saying: "I should have not sent you to that nice college instead." At this point I had to pacify both of them telling them to calm down and face the responsibility going forward, since things already happened.

Buy now at Mazon:
Every Man's Battle

If you come to think about it, most of the time it's the woman that has to bear all the rant and the man escaped unscathed, except perhaps when he will be confronted later on by the family for a claim of support for a child. Yet, it is undeniably should be a double responsibility on both parties man and woman. We know that man always face the greatest battle especially in their teens and twenties when their sexual drive is so strong. This is of course the time parents can come in and even the woman can stand beside to help him cope up with the battle one step at a time. Bombarded with proliferation of magazines, internet videos and websites and the presence of sensual materials man faces the undeniable temptation and urge that would somehow be hard to or impossible to avoid. But Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker, authors of the book "Every Man's Battle" talked that despite the impossible avoidance of the temptations, it is not impossible to confront or gain victory on them. Maybe parents can get hold of this book and give one to their sons or perhaps girlfriends help their boyfriend acquire one. Just a thought.

Anyway, my activity today, went from 7AM to 5PM, mostly spent inside the labor room of St. Vincent General Hospital where I assisted and helped Mrs. Catherine Kaye Cruz with her delivery. We had such a long labor, but at least the patient had a healthy, full term baby boy through vaginal delivery.

On the contrary, I was not able to go to my clinic because I have to attend to this patient and had my labs done late this afternoon due to the long wait for this patient to be delivered. Nevertheless, it was worth the wait because we successfully delivered normally a healthy baby boy. And the baby surprise we waited, finally came today.

Day 19 Chemo 2. Sun. 08/28/2017 "faintest faith I held in my soul" - big health progress of my mom - Thanks for the Surprise Lord

Day 19 Chemo 2. Sun. 08/28/2017 06:20PM

Lots of surprises today. Everyone woke up in a good mood with no grumbling and rumbling whatsoever as what I usually hear between my dad and my brother. Albeit, it seemed the attention of the family was on my mom teasing her to walk, without any assistance going to the dining area as she always does move towards the dining table with her wheelchair around. But gee, I was startled to see her sitting comfortably on an ordinary chair instead of her wheelchair. My heart was overjoyed for this big health progress of my mom. “Thank you very much Lord for hearing the yearnings of  my heart (You are indeed the best listener), as you slowly granted me the wish that I once told my mom on my 48th birthday. You know me so well, that you can conceive my thoughts from afar, you can sense even the inner feelings I kept within and decipher the faintest faith I held in my soul, much  like a size of a mustard seed. In your great mercy you so lavishly granted such unselfish act of wishing not for one’s self but for others, most especially to a dear mom.” Way back when  I had my birthday last August 20, 2017, I could vividly recall that in the midst of everyone’s enjoyment a little exasperation lodged in my heart with the trials that came into our family; the cancer that I was undergoing and the sudden heart attack of mom which caused paralysis on her left body. I was praying and wishing not for me but for my mom instead. And I shared such longing to Mommy telling her: “Mom, my wish for this birthday is not not actually for me but for you. I wished that God will make you walk again on or before your birthday this coming October 9, 2017.” And God is helping me realized this wish gradually.

The blaze of the sun just couldn’t stop its smile, for I got additional bonus of surprise too. Marked in the calendar as holiday, my son and my niece Steffi were off too, from the school today. And I ended up having an assistant to take care of the chores at home and my personal needs for health.  With her assistance we got my lunch organized, washed my bandanas and washed my mask. It was also a time to coach a niece, the essence of being self-motivated in stepping up with the daily grinds of the house  like washing the dishes, cleaning the dining area and their bedroom. A role she kind of play whimsically unless being pushed to do it, most especially on no school days.

Bearing the sting of hangover from the debut affair of Kim Tiu-Vasquez yesterday made me arrived late at my clinic today. Upon arrival with just a handful of 4-5 patients waiting, I thought it would be a relaxing day. Yet, surprise came knocking at my door again. There had been a sudden influx of patients to the point that my secretary was not able to have her lunch. I told her to eat while I’m doing an ultrasound of the pelvis of one of our patients, but she insisted that she will just finish all the patients first before having her lunch. Patients continued to come like manna from the sky, making me take less than 20 minutes break for lunch and finish past 5PM. That’s 2 hrs extra than the average range we cater for our patients. “Thank you Lord for all your blessings. You surprised me again.”

With all the activities and stretch out of hours in the clinic all that I could think of was rest. I still arrived home past 6PM though, (which is kind of late for me) because of the routine traffic in the early evening in my route home. Despite the tiring long day, I was still excited to reach home, have dinner and have a few hours of rest before going to the hospital and labor watched my patient, Mrs. Catherine Kaye Cruz, whom I just remembered and prayed for a safe delivery. May God bless her with a normal spontaneous vaginal delivery and have a healthy, full term baby. And this baby surprise is still waiting to come out.

Day 18 Chemo 2. Sat. 08/27/2017 10:39PM "Feeling beautiful on debut celebration of Kim Tiu Vasquez"

Day 18 Chemo 2. Sat. 08/27/2017 10:39PM

It’s supposed to be day 18 from my chemotherapy 2 and health wise I should also be up and about just as I was so relaxed last previous chemotherapy. Probably the late sleep late at night may have taken a toll on me that made me so tired. This did not hinder me of course to still wake up early and participated the early 5AM mass at Lourdes Parish. But of course when body is weak it forced me to sit down in the middle of the mass while the rest are up for the liturgy. Imagine the thought of finishing a thing so quickly in order for you to run back and curl on your bed. That’s what I did after all, getting back to sleep.

Getting additional sleep was at least helpful enough to get back up for breakfast time. Although, the semi fine day start, looked dimmed when I happened to see my niece, Ate Sinead exchanging a bit of harsh words with her father. A lady of her own right and knowing to stand already on her own, interference into the squabble between dad and daughter wasn’t warranted. So I kept my distance, but in all honesty, Ate Sinead could never be blamed why she acted like that. At times when one’s glass is full, it overflows. And that’s what happened with her getting frustrated and fed-up of her dad’s sarcastic ways of talking and  never changing ways of falling back and forth to his vices.

Lunch time came and it seemed everyone may have drained already their fumes of grievances or perhaps found a way to vent them in enjoying a sumptuous lunch of grilled pork. They say the door to a man’s heart is his stomach. Well, it might have some truth in it after all in this case, hi...hi..hi. The food of course was really delicious that we even invited my two secretaries, Gail and Rhea (who were waiting for the make-up session), to come at the table and eat with us.

After the sumptuous lunch, we started our make-up session for the upcoming debut celebration of Kim Tiu Vasquez. The session turned out great. When magic touch of an artist could turn a simple canvass into a glowing masterpiece, you will somehow feel elation. And that’s what Gail, Rhea and I felt, a glowing satisfaction and feeling beautiful. I love it all, that I even have to drive the three of us to the reception wearing my long gown and high heels. Can you imagine that? Hahaha.

We were all enjoying at the reception. Meeting along with old friends was a big factor of that enjoyment.It was nice seeing those old faces once again in a well adorned reception, exchanging splendid conversations over a lavished dinner. It was so much fun that I would have loved to stay foot longer but alas for me, I was a driver nonetheless for 2 secretaries too hi...hi. So, I ended leaving early and driving Gail and Rhea to their individual drop-off.

Day 17 Chemo 2. Sat. 08/26/2017 "Special Thanks to all the charitable people who helped me"

Day 17 Chemo 2. Sat. 08/26/2017 6:11AM

Today’s journal is exclusive for gratefulness. I wanna say thank you for all the prayers, encouraging words and the overwhelming support, love and care from my family, relatives, friends, neighbors, OB-friends, consultants, residents, nurses, classmates, patients and other doctors and people who knew me and I worked with.

To mommy Josefina Acosta Morata and papa Graciano Belacho Morata, I say thank you for the home that shelters me and my son Zacchaeus. To my nieces Ate Sinead Morata and her 2 sisters Steffi and Pauline, thank you. My stay in the hospital would not have been a little bit comfy without Ate Sinead who was helping me out on my entire stay during MRM (modified radical mastectomy). To my 2 sisters Rabbi Morata and Jona Morata Lanini, thank you very much. Rabbi made possible my mobility during chemo sessions by driving me to the hospital and back to our home. And to her (Rabbi) Opus Dei family thank you for helping us financially. My sister Jona had been so charitable sending us financial assistance from abroad. To my brother Alson Morata, thank you for helping me take care of my son and cooking for our daily meals. To his wife Lea Morata, thank you for taking good care of my mom and our household. To my husband Fredie Bacus though we are already separated, thank you for the Health Insurance and other financial support from you and your family.

Special thanks to my Guardian Angel “Noel Jerome Noel” who helped me since I was diagnosed and of course to his entire family, the “Noel's Family”, His mom, Mama Leticia Noel, to his wife Ana and 2 kids Benjamin Julian and Norbet Jerian and to his sisters (Lea, Rachel and Cathy) and brothers (Vic-vic and Jovi).

I have here a long list of people who loved me and cared for me:

1. Dr. Roselyn Cabahug Yu and her husband Dr. Andrei Yu, God’s instrument who initiated the “We Love  Karen” group chat.
2. Dr. Cytesse Cando Cambronero who helped Dr. Roselyn Yu and was the first one who helped me financially and her partner Sir Henry Gochuan.
3. Dr. Ma. Christina Bravo Aban and her husband Dr. Sathur Rey Aban.
4. And Dr. Marissa Bravo Garcia and the entire Bravo family who are also very good and nice to me ever since.
5. Dr. Editha “Bb” Tiu Vazques and family who is very supportive also in my medical care not only in my profession.
6. Dr. Vilma Borromeo Prado and her husband Sir Anthony and daughter Tonivi. Dr. Vilma Prado adopted me like a sister of her own.

To my OB-friends who had been generous thank you very much.

1. Dr. Yvette Rochelle Garcia
2. Dr. Lizelle Go
3. Dr. Ma. Theresa “Tess” Pepito
4. Dr. Gina Jiao Cal
5. Dr. Lyn Alana Busa
6. Dr. Susan Villaluz
7. Dr. Melvic Justimbaste
8. Dr. Melissa Cavada Dublin
9. Dr. Joanne Llaban
10. Dr. Rowena “Weng” Melencion

To my relatives, friends and classmates thank you very much.

1. Auntie Aida and Uncle Jonie Acosta
2. Katherine Jill Acosta - Coh
3. Jerry Paul “Jep-jep” Acosta
4. Ma. Conception “Bebskie” Acosta
5. Rowena Acosta Sitjar
6. Uncle Pedro “Pete" Acosta
7. Merriam Acosta Fernandez and her husband Jojo Fernandez and their 2 daughters Katrina and Krizza Fernandez
8. Timol and Dandan family (Taben, Keshia, Andrey, Ken-ken, Benjiemen)
9. Elaine Acosta Borja and her family
10. Ethel Sotto Gallego
11. Jonathan “Atan” Osabel
12. Roselyn Baring Lumapas
13. Sansie Labayan
14. Eunice Salinas
15. Atty. Llewelyn Porta
16. Jeanie Boncales Arellano
17. Maricel Liquido
18. Rutchel Tanoy
19. Abigail Formentera
20. Rhea Noval Caromayan
21. Elisa Quijano
22. Milcah Lim
23. Eula Pacifico
24. Cheryl Pelayo Dacua and her husband Jason Dacua

From “We Love Karen” Group thank you very much.

1. Dr. Judy Suarez-Chua (Her dad had undergone brain tumor cancer)
2. Claire Apor-Montegrande (D.R. Nurse)
3. Dr. Christine Suarez
4. Dr. Rosemaelyn Campugan
5. Dr. Sochie Belciña-Bacalso
6. Dr. Tinette Mendoza
7. Dr. Genevieve Academia Doble
8. Dr. Ann Go
9. Dr. Dolores Perez
10. Dr. Regina Perez
11. Dr. Liza Del Rosario
12. Dr. Ellen Haas
13. Dr. Philip Anthony Larrazabal
14. Dr. Imma Pua
15. Dr. Emiko Cañizares
16. Dr. Jennifer Camalongay
17. Dr. Moonyeen Aruelo
18. Dr. Detta Roble
19. Dr. Christine Gallego
20. Dr. Lei Hizola
21. Dr. Jean Regis
22. Dr. Sharen Alivio
23. Dr. Greta Canoy
24. Dr. Milagros Tan-Guy
25. Dr. Kimberly Guy
26. Dr. Weena Cabantan
27. Dr. Marilou Mangubat
28. Dr. Marifel Uy
29. Dr. Crispina Dango
30. Ledesa Rendal (Delivery Room-Nurse)
31. Dr. Romeo Singidas
32. Dr. Leah Villamor
33. Dr. Lawrence Ang
34. Dr. Cytesse Cambronero
35. Dr. Yvette Garcia

From PSH OB-GYNE Residents thank you very much

1. Dr. Lycelle Belarmino
2. Dr. Stephanie Causin
3. Dr. Sharee Ann Sale
4. Dr. Ma. Shiril Armers
5. Dr. Riena Hatab-Alcuizar
6. Dr. Norma Aranas
7. Dr. Cyrielle Cambronero
8. Dr. Sheryl Lyn Pepito
9. Dr. Fionna Paragas
10. Dr. Nina Pason
11. Dr. Maria Prescilla Seclon

"THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!"

Dr. Roselyn “Bulak” Cabahug-Yu said there are still a lot coming, so there will be another journal soon for gratefulness.

11:00PM

Today I ended up with a very nice mini concert by KZ Tandingan. The best "walang kapares" (no equal). Ha ha ha ha. Really KZ is such a very talented singer. Very cool. I love her music. It was so splendid much more that it was accompanied by her acoustic guitarist, McCoy Paragados, the best in town. And that what brought the place full packed with people, that a lot of them were already sitting on the floor below the stage. The music just mesmerized me to the point of being lost entirely into it, as if I was all alone I feel like I’m still alone ‘coz I could just get lost with their music. Superb!!! She brought the house down. Everybody was enjoying the concert. She sung the theme song of the movie “KITA-KITA”, entitled “Two less lonely people”. She had her very nice version of Imelda Papin’s “Isang Lingong pag-ibig”. Congrats KZ! Salute to you!